Partnering with Your Body Part III - Mutual Trust
Part 3 out of 3 part series – Mutual Trust
Over my past three blogs, I have been talking about partnering with your body. The hard truth is that many of you may not want to. In fact, some of you may be outright enemies with your body. Trauma and internalized weight stigma -being fed the idea that your body needed to fit the thin ideal in order to be loved and feel you belong -may have severely damaged this relationship.
We have also discussed reasons you might want to partner with your body. Such as how being in partnership with your body is being in a place of true power. From this partnership, you can be guided to set the boundaries you need. Partnering with your body can be a big step to heal trauma. It is in partnership with your body that you experience the wisdom of your emotions and your intuition. From this place of partnership you can best take care of yourself and best be a force for Good in the world.
We’ve already addressed some of the aspects of a loving partnership (respect and open communication) in parts 1 and 2 of this blog series. Please read below if you missed these. In this particular blog, we’ll look at a 3rd aspect of a loving partnership, the aspect of Mutual Trust.
Many have had the experience of building trust in a relationship. It takes time, intention, and courage. All trust building is a practice, not an overnight experience or sudden landing. The same thing goes for building trust with your body.
Here are some ways to begin to build mutual body trust:
One important way is to begin to trust your body’s cues. The subtle and the not-so-subtle ones. Then, prioritize what you hear. This could mean, for example, taking a meal break when you’re feeling low on energy, even if you are in a work culture that is dominated by folks who work through lunch.
Trust your body’s yes-es and her no-s. When you feel that wiggly feeling inside telling you no, trust that and practice setting a boundary.
Limit body checking. As the name implies, body checking is repeatedly checking your shape or weight. It is a way to try to manage or keep a watch over your body and its natural expression. Examples of body checking are frequent weighing, scrutinizing yourself in the mirror for flaws, checking how clothes fit, or looking in the mirror particularly at traits associated with gender norms. In this work of body trust, I urge my clients to release body checking and to let their body sort out the weight.
Allow yourself to be guided by pleasure and satisfaction. These are your body’s ways of telling you you’re on track. When choosing a meal, let satisfaction inform your decision, when exercising your body, allow joy to direct your movement.
We may not feel trust immediately. That’s OK. We can take baby steps and take actions rooted in trust. Each time we avoid body checking or listen to our body we are laying another brick in the foundation of trust upon which we will build our healthy partnership with our body.
Keep in mind, building trust in your body is a two-way street. You want to trust your body, and, as in any relationship, your body needs to trust you too. Unfortunately, many of my clients, after years of dieting, experience a sort of “food insecurity.” Their body doesn’t know the difference between restriction due to dieting and the restriction brought on by an actual famine. Feeding yourself consistently and providing yourself consistent access to desserts/treats is an essential part of building trust.
I am a Certified Body Trust Provider. So, this topic of mutual body trust is near and dear to my heart. The wonderful folks at The Center For Body Trust (where I got my certification) have recently released a beautiful book all about this topic called Reclaiming Body Trust.
For support in this partnership with your body, you may wish to partner with a Body Trust Provider. To schedule a meet and greet with Heart Guided Nutrition click here.